There is a certain type of exhaustion associated with not feeling at ease within one's home. Perhaps the kitchen is always untidy. Maybe the arguments between the flatmates never cease. Maybe the reason for never leaving one’s bedroom is that you don't feel comfortable meeting someone in the hallway. You probably convince yourself that it is only temporary.
"I will leave when my tenancy ends."
"It's not that big a deal."
"But everyone dislikes living in a flatshare sometimes."
However, if your home makes you feel constantly stressed out, it begins to have an impact on something far beyond your night hours. It has an influence on your sleeping habits, your daily routine and even your self-confidence. And sometimes, if the cause behind spending countless hours in bed and sleeping does not appear to be laziness, it might be the desire to stay where one feels comfortable and safe.
When Your Bedroom Becomes Your Entire World
The bedroom is meant to serve as a resting area. But there is a difference between having a pleasant evening in your room and having a feeling of being trapped there. If the common kitchen is always dirty, the living room is uncomfortable, and there is constant friction between you and your co-tenants, your bedroom can gradually turn into your only sanctuary.
You eat there.
You work there.
You browse your phone there.
You pass your weekend there.
In such a case, getting out of the room can become an ordeal. What's wrong is not staying in bed. It is the living conditions making other parts of your apartment unwelcoming to you.
Before You Decide to Move, Try Addressing the Problem
It’s not always easy to move right away. If you’re unhappy with your shared living situation, begin where you can control. Have an open discussion with your flatmates about any problems that exist.
Rather than:
“You guys are such a mess.”
Say:
“Can we come up with a schedule to keep the kitchen clean? It’s becoming hard for me because dishes aren’t being done for a few days at a time.” Specifically address the problem and the solution you want. In the case of a property problem, contact your landlord or letting agent instead of enduring the issue. Finally, if your environment is really making you unwell, reach out to someone you can talk to. You don’t need to handle everything on your own.
Sometimes the Problem Isn't You. It's the Environment.
It's very common to focus on optimizing our processes when we feel drained.
- Start waking up earlier.
- Workout more.
- Limit yourself from being on your phone all the time.
- Get out of bed.
Sometimes these can truly help.
But it's also worth asking another question:
"Am I comfortable with my surroundings?"
Because it is quite hard to build any routine in a space where you're never feeling at ease. The house doesn't necessarily need to be impeccable. But there should be at least one space where you could take a breath.
Final Thoughts
Your accommodation might have an effect on your daily life that you do not imagine. The people who stay with you, the state of the accommodation, the amount of privacy you get, and the ambiance in the house influence the level of your comfort. If you have been lying down on your bed more and more often, thinking that you cannot handle the house anymore, you need to realize that it might not be because you are lazy. It may be worthwhile to think about what is going on. Since looking for proper accommodation is not only about searching for the right rent or postcode. It is about finding the right place where you can really live and not hide from life.
